Upon continuing the hunt for a pair of leather leggings long enough for my legs in a small size… Here’s a – hopefully funny – list of problems I experienced that only model-tall girls understand!
1. In elementary school, you were the tallest in your class. You were a head taller than most of the guys. On group photos, you stood in the back, next to the teachers, who were by chance also shorter than you, oh, those lovely, petite, elderly ladies. You probably had a “funny” nickname, referring to you looking like a stick. Now when you stumble upon those aforementioned pictures, can laugh on how you looked like some starving child from the 3rd world, your knees being the widest part of your legs – but back then, you didn’t understand why people were always concerned about your weight/height.
2. You have bad posture from trying to appear shorter in your younger days. Hunching was your signature pose on photos or in group situations until the age of 16.
3. Then random strangers started to tell you, you should start modeling. First, when it came from cool-looking shop assistants in your local mall, it actually boosted your self confidence – wow, finally someone gets it, I do kind of look like one, right? But it got old pretty fast. Nice try, guys…
4. You probably came to terms with all the cutest guys being at best your height. Your date doesn’t have to tower over you. You’re a confident woman, such as Nicole Kidman, Katie Holmes, Rosie Huntington-Whitley, Carla Bruni,… Oh yes, admit it, in your younger years, you spent some hours googling celebs with slightly shorter boyfriends!
5. But guys didn’t have those years to get accustomed to the situation, so they can get weird. Wow, you are tall! And you don’t even wear heels. I better draw myself up next to you! How long are those legs exactly? Are you a model? Do you mind dating shorter guys or you only go out with basketball players?
6. You get asked lots of uncomfortable/boring questions. Exactly how tall are you? You’ll never know, maybe I’m 1,78, maybe I’m not, maybe I’m just telling you I am, because 1,80 does not sound like a girl’s height… Do you play basketball? Volleyball? No. I was bad at coordinating my long limbs in high school – and I did not get better ever since. This is why I don’t go to choreographed workout classes, either.
7. About workout… You have to lift your legs so much higher to have them for example in line with your hips or bend so much further to reach your toes… And also the leverage is bigger because of you long limbs, so for you, those dumbbells are actually harder to lift. Am I right?
8. Hot sexy dancing is awkward when your lanky limbs are flailing everywhere. Especially in the presence of shorter females to whom people can compare you.
9. When you meet a fellow tall girl, you instantly feel attracted to her. You want to be friends with her. Do everything together and talk about other people being hobbits. Not feeling like a giant amazon, but like a supermodel, when you walk together on the street. In heels.
10. Have to either wear flats or feel like you’re towering over everyone. This one is a classic dilemma. You leave home in your heels, you walk the pavement like it’s your own catwalk. Then you get on public transport and you can easily look over everybody’s heads – this is when the familiar awkward feeling appears. When you’re giving a presentation or at an exam, towering over others is good, you have instant power. But in a friendly situation, it is just strange that you have to constantly look down to have a conversation.
11. Hugging short friends requires extreme knee-bending. You are in a constant squat while talking to people.
12. And if we’re at squatting and hunching… Trying to wash your hair when the shower head is shorter than you are. Looking at a mirror when it ends at about your eyes. Having serious pain in your lower back after hunching over a kitchen counter. Hitting your head on everyone’s dining room chandelier/hanging light fixture.
13. Any time you are on a road trip, plane, or any mode of transportation where the person in front of you can “recline,” it becomes the Worst Trip In The World. Excuse me? Sir? You’re on my legs. Sir? Wake up!
14. On the other hand, you feel guilty for always blocking everyone’s view when you go to a concert or the movies. But you got quite good at repressing it. You can’t always stand in the back!
15. Oh, all those wardrobe malfunctions… Pants always fit your waist/legs but not the long way. Before ankle-length skinny jeans were in style — when bell-bottoms and boot cuts were “the jeans,” this was a nightmare. More funny pictures from your adolescence to burn. Also, trying to find a maxi dress that actually touches the ground is nearly impossible. You thought about building an attitude, with what you can wear those shorter ones hanging around your ankles, with ease. Jacket sleeves and long-sleeved shirts are too short. Which is fine in warm weather, because rolled-up sleeves are cool, but the winter sucks… Rompers give you major cameltoe. Sorry, no trendy summer onesie for you.
Inspiration came from this funny article.